FAIL, But Not Forever

So yeah, I know. I know that I said I would post every single day for a whole month and then immediately failed to post at all for days. I know that. And I know how that would make my mom, dad, third grade violin teacher Mrs. Felder, 7th grade social studies teacher Mrs. Carson and Barack Hussein Obama feel: disappointed. Disappointed in me for wasting my potential they would each say, shaking their head and looking like not one single thing in this world was more important than me posting on this blog like I promised I would.


Well guess what guys? A little something called LIFE? It gets in the way sometimes.
After only 4 days of being a "resident" of Massachusetts, I came back to NYC for a fun-filled weekend of birthday celebration with my friends. Not my birthday, other peoples, but... Things were lovely and alcoholy and fun and my friends are awesome is the bottom line. But prior to that I was trying to open bank accounts and clean bathrooms and use giant packing boxes as makeshift dressers so yes, shit got in the way of my posting. And the truth of the matter is that I didn't have What It Takes to post anything of substance and if you know me well (which, of course all zero of you who are reading this do) you know that I don't like to do things half-assedly.

So today's the day we begin FOR REAL. FOR REALSIES. From now until September 9th, barring an ACT OF GOD, I will post every day. About something. So there.

Right now I am on the BoltBus back to Boston and there is a kid across the aisle and one row in front who will NOT. STOP. STARING AT ME. I mean, I own mirrors, people. I KNOW I look good. But one would tend to think that in this digital day and age a child of about ten would only even be able to look at me for about 7 seconds without immediately requiring some other type of ocular stimulation. But apparently my exhausted, sleep deprived, makeup-less visage is as captivating as a Dora the Explorer movie or whatever it is that kids are into this days. (I always swore I wasn't going to be one of those people who doesn't know what the hell is going on with Kids These Days as far as their pop cultural shenanigans go, but lo and behold it's happened. Ah, well....)

You would also probably be inclined to think that the magnitude, consistency and duration of this staring is the type of thing that a mother would have trained a child against but you would be wrong again folks, because said mother is seated in front of the daughter gabbing away at her cell phone like we are in her home. Apples and trees, people. Apples and trees.
Not to put too fine a point on it, but these are also people who are carring bagS (note the PLURAL, meaning more than ONE) from the M&M store, (which apparently needs to exist) and American Girl Place. These are the kinds of people who come to New York to shop in chain novelty stores and then drag their wares home to Boston on a bus which they treat like their own personal living room.

In additon to staring this young girl is also profoundly fidgety. She keeps shifting and moving and turning around in her seat &c and the poor young woman unfortunate enough to be seated next her had been TRYING to do some work on a laptop but was forced to close it up from all the jostling and is now sitting with her hands folded atop her closed laptop, staring dejectedly out the window , most likely rueing her decision not to take a urine-soaked Greyhound.
This bus is rawther cozy though; perfect temperature and if I didn't feel so completely that I needed a shower I would be able to comfortably doze off.

I want to have an "image" because I like when people have visuals with their posts but I can't think of much to insert here. So I'll do the next best thing to relevance; Google Image Search!

Some artist made collages of images that came up when she subjected certain words (love, marriage &c) to a Google Image Search. My first thought was "oh shit, that counts as art?" and my second thought was "not a bad social thermometer".

So here goes. I'm picking the very first image that I see for each with NO exceptions.

Fidgety Child:















Okay pretty much the opposite of what I googled, but okay. Next.

Rude Mother:

This one almost didn't post but I PERSEVERED. See, Mrs. Carson?












Innocent Bystander:

















Perhaps a bit too literal, but so be it.

And finally.

Angst:


















Again, we are literal. but oh well. Also, is that supposed to be Harry Potter? Dunno.

Well that's all for today, folks! I'll see ya tomorrow. And I really will.